All I need is YOU.

She is exactly where I want to keep her for my entire life...in my arms. I just can't let her go ever. I just can't seem to stop kissing her beautiful face. I am so engrossed in her that when she starts pulling back I, hold her more tightly and seal our lips and remind her what she is running away from. I can't stop touching her, I want to feel her everywhere.

I'm so engrossed in the moment that I don't realize that she is trying to free herself from my vice grip. I immediately leave her when I see the panic on her face. That is not the expression I want to see on her face when she is with me. I do not want to make her feel uncomfortable. I try to hold her again but she just moves away and stands by the window with her back towards me.


"Sarah please listen to me", I say. I am confused all of a sudden.... she was surely with me on the same page seconds before.

"Please just leave Araash, there is nothing to say at the moment and I don't wish to hear anything too. Please just leave me alone. "

She goes and opens the door signalling me to leave. I want to say so many things to her but looking at her face I know that she won't listen to anything with an open mind. When I reach at the door; I give her a quick hug and kiss her forehead. She doesn't even return my hug, but I don't mind at least she didn't pull away. With that thought I pull away." I will call you ok please don't overthink, promise me".?? I say.

"Please don't. Give me some space I will reach out to you myself. "

My heart just stopped beating for a second ,listening to her. But with a heavy heart and words unsaid I leave.

It's been 2 days since I have last spoken to her our chats have stopped too. I thought it's better to give her some space, she will contact me when she thinks it's right. I am trying to be patient here. But not talking to her is killing me I'm unable to concentrate on work or sleep or eat well. All I have achieved is smoking packets of cigarettes. I decide to  give her 2 more days max and then reach out to her, enough of this no talking business.

I have opened and stared at the chat window hundred times, dialled his number a thousand times and disconnected the call.  The problem is I, don't know what to say. After all that has happened just having a casual talk is not possible, at least not by me. And more over he has not bothered to contact me at all. As if it doesn't matter. So what If I said don't call or msg, I was upset so I said it at that particular moment. He should have at least tried to break the ice.

I have just about survived the last two days without talking to him. Have been so absent minded about everything. All that transpired has been running in my head all the time. Can't stop thinking about it. Initially I was full of guilt but more the time passed I started looking at it as the inevitable, if two people are attracted to each other this is bound to happen. Have decided not to analyse anything anymore and just go with the flow. I hope I have taken the right decision.

I have been tired of whaling and drowning in self pity and waiting for Aarash to get in touch. Thankfully I have a friend's birthday party to attend tomorrow. I hope that helps me change my mood. I love hanging out with my friends on any given day, but I am not in the greatest of moods to attend a party, having not spoken with Araash since two days. Since it is a very close friend's birthday I decided to go.

I am trying to keep myself involved in the conversations around me, all are having fun expect me. I am physically here but my mind is wandering away towards Araash. If he would just call and talk to me once my mood will be so much better. My mood has not gone unnoticed by my friends, but they have decided to leave me alone.

Since the last few minutes I am getting a feeling as if someone is watching me, I look around but find no one. I blame the jitters on the drink and decide to use the ladies room. On my way back I get the feeling of being watched again so I stop just before I am about to reach my table and look around. There he is standing with a drink in his hand by the bar counter shooting daggers at me. He tips his glass to me and blesses me with his glorious smile and just like that my mood is uplifted.

Avoiding the Expected

Intro

Hey all !! I would like to introduce you all to Sarah, the woman of my story. She is very family oriented, her husband and her kid mean the world to her. She is a very caring and giving person. Also she is very loveable, anyone can easily fall in love with her. She makes friends easily and can do anything for them. She is the kind of friend everyone would like to have in their life. She can have endless conversations. She believes a woman has so much love in her heart that she can fill this world with loads of love and still have more to share. She can't be angry with anyone no matter how much a person upsets her. She is a daring and a straightforward person and doesn't like to mix her words. She believes in letting one know how she feels about a person rather than hiding it. She hates to lie for any reason and hates to be lied to too.

She guards her heart very strongly and doesn't let anyone in easily, but once she let's someone in they remain there forever. She believes that everything happens for a reason and is always happy and content about her life.

Avoiding the Expected

I have just got back from the gym and start doing my morning chores when my phone chimes with an incoming text. Even before looking at it I know who it is from.

Araash:" Hi, it's so hot today so I'm enjoying your favorite ice cream Almond praline from B&R would you like some?? ( a pic of him eating the ice cream)


Arrggg he is enjoying my fav ice cream and sending me a snapshot looking so handsome. Looking at the pic has made me forget how my favourite ice cream even tastes. All I can think about is Araash....Ohh god what should I do with my stupid thoughts I need to control it and not think of him other than a good friend and that the kiss was a mistake.

Me: "hey, wow so lucky enjoying ice cream, but no thanks I just got back from the gym, burning some calories don't wish to add them on so soon".

Araash: "ohh yeah you and your workout, one ice cream won't kill you you know. Are you sure you don't want any I'm at the store near your house, I can come and drop some for you, you can always have it later. Especially you know in the middle of the nights when you are always hungry.

How the hell do I tell him I don't wish to see him. How am I suppose to control my self around him?? Repeating the same mistake twice is not a mistake anymore. Need to think of something fast....

Me: "Yeah you're right but you know what??I think I'm getting a cold so it's better I skip  ice cream this time".

Araash: "ohh is it.. What happened??You didn't mention anything about having a cold earlier and I am surprised you are refusing your fav ice cream. Most of the times you want to eat it and now you're refusing to have it even when it's being delivered to your door step? You can always have a little,you know they say cold kills cold.

How  do I tell him I don't want to see you, looking all handsome once again that to behind closed doors. This is all getting so weird. We both loved  catching up randomly at home or outside and now avoiding him ,so that we don't do anything stupid is just so Stupid!! My phone alerts me of another incoming text and I come out of my stupor. It's from Araash.

Araash:" ok I waited long enough for your reply and now I'm on my way to your place. See u soon..

Seriously !!!! How long did I not reply back to him, could he not wait for a few minutes for my reply?? And now I have to face him and explain to him the cold I never got. actually..I sneezed in the morning a couple of times so that does count as a cold rite??? Okay I have really lost it.

He is here in my space looking devastatingly handsome. He is wearing a white button down shirt neatly tucked in his grey trousers. His hair is all disheveled pointing in all directions thanks to his habit of running his hands through them all the time. His stubble has grown just perfect the way I like it on him. He looks delicious.

My plan to keep as much distance in between us is short lived as he engulfs me in his big arms and gives me a hug, he smells divine all fresh water and minty. He lightly pecks me on my cheek. He leaves me all rendered,speechless, motionless and useless and goes and gets all comfortable on the sofa. He looks so perfect sitting there on the sofa a complete Adonis. I come out of my trance and collect the ice cream from him. As I was cooking before he decided to come and interrupt me so, I continue with my work. There was hardly any work left but I want to keep as much distance as possible between us, so I stay put in the kitchen.  I have to ask him to leave soon somehow.

I turn back to go and talk to him and find him standing in the doorway of the kitchen. The look on his face has me worried. he is  chomping on his lower lip and the worry frown on his forehead is the giveaway to the thoughts he is having. Before I can say anything he starts walking towards me. 

The Otherside

I am staring at the door, wondering what the hell am I doing?? I tried my best to stay away from her for the past few days, did not chat with her as we normally would nor called. But the truth is that, the harder I try to pull away, the closer I get to her.I end up just thinking more about her. This feeling which I have for her is blowing my mind away. I am so confused about everything in life right now and now the way I feel about her, has just enhanced that confusion so much more. I was in a daze of my own thoughts floating away in the confusing maze of my life , when she opened the door.

There she was looking as beautiful as ever or probably more so today, and some of the haze of my confusion cleared. I have been mesmerized by her chocolate brown eyes ever since the first time I looked into them. It seems as if she can see right through me. She has left her hair open today, which fell loosely around her beautiful face. And her lips I wonder, would they feel as soft as I think they are. She is just perfect, other then her nose maybe which could have been better. No one would ever guess that she is married, and has a kid. She takes wonderful care of herself. I am really attracted to her, in fact anyone with a sane mind would be. And it's not just about her physical appearance, she is also a beautiful person at heart. It must have been a few seconds since she had opened the door and I was shamelessly ogling at her, but wait a sec what is wrong with her she hasn't moved at all and has not even spoken a word. So just to throw her off balance I, wink at her and ask her to invite me in.

It has only been a minute since I have arrived and my phone starts ringing. My friend couldn't have chosen a worse timing to call me than today, to discuss about the job which I was looking forward to apply for. So I tell her to hang on for a moment and finished my call. All my attention is fixed on her, so I hurriedly wrap up my call and before I know it I have her in my arms. I just can't seem to let her go, so I held her at arms length and apologized for my cold behavior towards her for the past few days. For the sweet thing she is she readily took all the blame on herself and did not want me to apologize to her for anything in fact she was  ready to accept me as a friend. She  was just happy to have me in her life.

I was a fool for taking so much time to understand her, she is the best thing that has happened to me recently and the fool that I am, I was trying to pull myself away from her. She is surely not like the other girls I know, never demanding about anything. Doesn't ever ask to be called all the time or messaged. She gives enough space that a guy needs in a relation. And so I decide to tell her exactly how I feel for her. I tell her that I like her more than a friend and I don't expect her to like me in return. But I, just cannot hide how I feel for her anymore, and she should be the first person to know. I held and kissed her on her forehead and awaited for her response.

She has been really quiet the entire evening, and now I am worried that I have probably crossed a line,how can I forget that she is happily married and only wants to be friends with me. The truth is that I really like her and her decision wouldn't matter, I would always be her friend. I adore her for the women she is and the friend she is to me. I respect the fact that she has a family and they would always be her priority, I do not intend to take their place and will never let her do that to them too. I respect her husband for letting her live her life the way she wants to. For having faith in her and me and knowing that we would never break his trust.
out
I looked at her and saw hope in her eyes towards me and how much she liked me too. And it all just happened in a matter of  seconds when I experienced the most beautiful and tender kiss of my life ever.

Right then my phone starts ringing and we both had to pull away, the call was from the consultancy through which I was applying for my new job . They needed to meet me immediately. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I have to leave her like this right now. But then my career was important too and I was sure she would understand. I said my goodbyes to her and left  her place...